7 things I do when alone in the kitchen


Like any home cook, I spend a lot of time in my kitchen. Between me and the two kids during the day and feeding all four of us dinner at night, that's a lot of hours spent peeling, chopping, stirring and generally fueling four people's lives. While much of that time is spent focused on the task, sometimes my mind, and behaviour, gets a little sidetracked. So, it's confession time. Here are seven things I do while alone in the kitchen. Don't judge me. You might even do some of these too.

1. Speak in foreign accents

I don't know why I do this. It's bad enough that I talk to myself, I guess, but I'm fairly certain most people engage in a little self chat at some point in their day. The accents vary, based on whatever media I've been sponging up. My love of Coronation Street means I'm often in Manchester mode. Occasionally I go slightly German, maybe a southern tongue while rolling out a pecan pie. Whatever suits.

2. Lip sync
Accuracy is of little to no importance with this one. Who's gonna know if I lipped "Licky boom boom now" or "licky boom boom down?" No one, that's who. And it's a meaningless lyric anyway (really, I met Snow once and I asked him). The only thing that matters is that I'm lost in the music and the moment and the sound of the radio is drowning out the wail of toy police cars being bashed together by happy little boys in the next room.

3. Dance
Again, it doesn't matter if I do it well (see above). But, for the record, I do it well.


4. Pull my &%@ bangs up
Not for hygiene reasons or anything. Just because I can't stand my bangs tickling my eyes or my nose when I'm cooking. Can't. Stand. It. I'm like that about turtle necks too. Don't tickle my neck, clothes. Just don't. So my bangs, which are always in some state of growing out or being newly trimmed, get pulled back and secured with whatever clip I can find in the bathroom or at the bottom of my purse. It normally doesn't look too cute. Just a clip on top of my head. And it's like I can breathe again.

5. Take photos that never get used
I'll see something pretty in the process of cooking and feel the need to capture it. Yup, totally self-indulgent. Sometimes I photograph meals that never make it to the blog, but the photos are still sitting there on my camera's memory card like a little reminder of past food flops. I really ought to delete and move on. But I'll never stop taking photos.

6. Be a nosy neighbour
Who's that man knocking next door? Why is that woman parking her car there? Why are my neighbour's apple trees blooming earlier than mine? Call it a sort of neighbourhood watch service.

7. Spot stuff that needs doing, then do nothing

The pantry has stuff that's probably expired. The fridge needs cleaning. I should make tomorrow's lunches now. The dishwasher needs to be emptied. The garbage is overflowing. And on and on. Oh, hey I love this song! Dance.

How many of these can you relate to? What weird and wonderful things do you do when alone in your kitchen?

15 comments:

  1. LOL, Amy! This is so true.
    I am glad to hear that I am not the only self-proclaimed neighbourhood watcher! Every time my neighbour's little dog starts barking, I peer out my kitchen window... just in case.
    Then I snap a photo of a droopy cheese cake.

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    1. Really, we are performing a vital service in our neighbourhoods. Keep snapping those shots!

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  2. Amen to numbers 3, 6, and 7!! Too funny!

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    1. Confession is a good thing. Then you can carry on doing it but without the guilt.

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  3. I am soooo guilty of number 6! My neighbours living room faces my kitchen window, and I am also peeking through to see what she's watching on TV (I swear she watches marathons of Y&R!)

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    1. Hey, if she's not shutting her curtains it's fair game. You could almost cancel your cable and just watch hers.

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  4. Oh I love this Amy!! My 5 year old son calls me "annoying" when I speak in a southern accent while making corn bread, but I can't help myself. And spontaneous dancing is a must while cooking!

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    1. You gotta dance when you makin' cornbrayyyd.

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  5. I completely relate to all those things but most notably #4! Nothing more obnoxious than hair in face...I have to say its a love-hate relationship, I want bangs but at the same time...tame yourselves hairlets!

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    1. It's like they're attacking, destroying my spirit, one tickle at a time.

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  6. Great post, Amy! And so funny. Now you have me thinking about all the things that I do on my own in the kitchen. #1 would be MAKE A HUGE GIANT MESS, rather than clean as I go. So much for all my training :)

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    1. I love when people can admit they don't take perfectly good advice. You gotta be you.

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  7. oh man, I totally spot stuff that needs doing and then ignore it too. I also sit on the floor to watch stuff bake on the oven while I check instagram and sing to myself. Often with velcro rollers in my hair if I'm heading out later. Glad other people have strange kitchen behavior!

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    1. Ahhh, I sit on the floor and watch the oven too! Ha ha. Thanks for the laugh :)

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